Thankfulness

>> Thursday, November 3, 2011

“We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures.” 
— Thornton Wilder




I always find it difficult to jot down the things I am thankful for. It always ends up feeling so obvious and phony. I mean, of course I am going to say that I am grateful for my kids, my home, health, job... but what does it really mean to me? Why am I grateful for these things? Am I really grateful for them? Let's be real - it's difficult raising 2 children on your own, taking care of a home can be financially burdensome on one income, and it's disheartening feeling stuck in a job that does not fulfill me.
I've always been one to be complacent with my circumstances because I always thought, "well, it could be worse. I could be homeless, unemployed or alone", but how honest am I being? Life is not always easy, in fact, I'd say it's rarely easy.  My circumstances are not what I expected.  I promised myself that I would never be a single mother, I thought for sure that I would make the right decision when I got married, but somethings are just out of our control.  And now, my life has gotten off of the path I thought I had it on, the one that I thought I was in control of. That is just fine with me because I am truly thankful for those things I said.

I am thankful for my children -
they make me smile when I am angry
they remind me that it's OK to be silly, irresponsible, and immature sometimes
their simple way of thinking helps me to slow down and enjoy the moment

My home -
It's my place to make memories
It's my security blanket
It's my place to relax and be completely me

My job -
allows me to provide for my family
allows me to take care of my necessities and have extra for that other pair of shoes
Provides enough income that I only have to work one job
Gives me flexible hours to allow me to take care of my family

Lately though, I am mostly thankful for:
My eyes being opened and my soul reawakened
For the resurgence I feel in my faith
For the hope this all has given me.



5 comments:

GodsOwn/Bernice November 3, 2011 at 9:37 AM  

So true what you said! Love your honesty and the list you made.
Blessings onyour day!

Brandi November 3, 2011 at 5:07 PM  

I LOVE your honesty too! I clicked "follow" after reading only your "about me"! I love how you see yourself as trying to balance out spirituality and your 'wild child'! I often feel as if all of my life is one huge balancing act and I'm teetering on the brink of losing it!

I am right there with you on feeling like it's fake at times because of the challenges in this life! I am so thankful that the Lord gives us all we need to get through!

One more thing for me to be thankful for today is finding your blog and getting linked up!

Stopping on by from http://livelaughlove-brandi.blogspot.com/

God Bless,
Brandi

Joan November 4, 2011 at 9:59 PM  

I too love your honesty. I confess, there are times when I don't feel thankful. For most of this year, I have participated in the 1000 Gifts link-up. There were times when I felt that I was just putting words on paper (or the computer screen). Thank you for joining in for 30 Days of Thanksgiving.

Many blessings,
Joan

faith hope love ღ November 5, 2011 at 1:00 AM  

nice post thanks for sharing loves..

Nona November 8, 2011 at 4:55 PM  

I'm a new follower. I love your honesty too. May our Lord keep you calm and so in love with Him, as you travel this difficult road. I know how difficult it is too. May you and your blessed children trust Him for all your needs, dreams and desires. Thank God, He is a Husband and Father to those who need Him, and who doesn't? Blessings, Nona@gr8day2save.com

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